The Omegle Report #1: Birth of a Religion.

Question to discuss: Do you believe in spirits/ghosts? Have you had any personal experiences with the paranormal? If so, tell us!

Stranger: haha me dumb fucks lol

Paddy: Go back to /x/.

Stranger: ROfl,>

Stranger: YOu Go zbl;akc Kto XXXXXX

Stranger: WHy

Stranger: okAYT?>

Paddy: Holy shit, Stranger is fucking crazy.

Stranger: I mAN WOET;HN :cray>zxz

Stranger: YOAUR crazyh.

Stranger: towle

Stranger: TOWEL

Stranger: LO!lo!L

Paddy: This is really quite disjointing.

Stranger: QuiTK JudgiNGn mE

Stranger: FAK

Paddy: English, mother fucker? Do you speak it?

Paddy: *mother-fucker.

Paddy: That deserves a hyphen.



Stranger: YOr;u”RE A JHypehen

Paddy: No, I’m not.

Paddy: I’m obviously a semi-colon.

Stranger: HPYEH:hn


Paddy: That’s not a bad word.

Paddy: “ROFLZBUVIOUSLY”, I rather like it.

Stranger: AHUHAUH H

Paddy: You, sir, have obviously been blessed with a linguistic genius which I was totally blind to before.

Stranger: :Your’e GOiDJD Dan Mrn GIht

Stranger: “-Walther DHITE”

Paddy: *Compiles your ramblings in order to create a new holy book for the 21st century*

Paddy: I feel like Moses.


Stranger: oamisg LK:

Stranger: omg

Stranger: sdFOMg

Stranger: EY :AM LUCID

Paddy: Please, tell us more. How should we live? Can we eat pork?

Stranger: StOp OfDUCkINg IN THe FROnT NHole

Stranger: n( mOR kid

Paddy: Commandant Number One. StOp OfDUCkINg IN THe FROnT NHole.

Paddy: I’m not sure how Betty will feel about that but she’ll have to get used to it.

Stranger: I liKWE bitPinball

Paddy: Commandment Number Two. I liKWE bitPinball.

Stranger: drzgbuzRbAADDDDD for you

Paddy: That’s bound to cause splits in the Church.


Paddy: Commandment Number Three. drzgbuzRbAADDDDD for you.

Paddy: Yes, oh Mighty One, I believe so.

Stranger: WHAt isi YOuR FuAvoRIONT SPORL

Stranger: FOobOTbaLL

Stranger: dAAAAA BU$SRS

Paddy: MO, you wish us to play football?

Paddy: American or Ingerlish?

Stranger: YS

Stranger: A

Paddy: Oh, I’m going to have to get a new kit.

Paddy: Is there any more you can offer us? We, your most blessed of children?

Stranger: AlywaYsyays alywyaz sYy AYLsyyala


Stranger: WHne NdY YOU bPOOP

Paddy: Most brilliant advice.

Paddy: What about war? Is war also bad?

Stranger: No

Paddy: Should we spread your word with the sword?

Stranger: LIKe Y AIDS

Stranger: OK?

Paddy: *Jots down “LIKe Y AIDS” into stone tablet*

Paddy: Yes, I’ve got it.

Stranger: VL;yer YUCHG ODOS

Stranger: GOLOOOOOO)O\

Stranger: D

Paddy: What a privilege.

Stranger: I: giV:o8e M yYOu MyfblesINg

Paddy: Thank you, Mighty One.

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